It's testing season in Texas. Our school just finished spring benchmarks. For those who don't know, benchmarks are when we test our students on ALL of the content taught in the year. Typically we try to mimic the actual day of the ever popular, high stakes, state test. For 4th graders in Texas, that means four days of benchmarks. Yes, I said four, or 4, or cuatro, or however you want to say it. Nine and ten year old boys and girls sit for 4 days, 4 hours each day and test. Now, I won't get on my soapbox here, but you can expect it at a later time.
Don't get me wrong, benchmarks are very useful. They tell us where our students are struggling or not struggling. The data that can be gleaned from benchmark scores is invaluable. I can look at the data and tell you which standards need to be retaught. Or, where students might have misconstrued ideas of how to solve a particular problem. Or even when their perseverance waned and started guessing.
The week before benchmark week consisted of... one professional development day for teachers (no school for kids), one full day off for snow and ice, well mostly ice, one full day of school but without most of the students because buses couldn't run in the morning (we have many students whose parents work and live on dairies), one full "normal" day and finally, one morning of school, because we were blessed with more ice and snow so we dismissed school at 12:30. So much for review.
Benchmark week. Monday through Thursday. Well, Monday through Wednesday. Thursday ended up being a day off for a most incredible ice storm. That would be the day of our scheduled Math benchmark. Awesome.
I don't know if you know this but teachers get really freaked about scores. Not just a little freaked, freaked to the point of sleepless nights, and when you do sleep, nightmares. Even physical manifestations of freaked, headaches, nausea, can't eat or can't stop eating, food goes down but comes back up, the list goes on and on.
Why does this happen? Because we are being judged. Our very worth as a teacher is in the hands of a student. A student who might have had a bad morning at home. A student who just isn't feeling productive that particular day. A student who needs to be in special ed but is "too low" to qualify. A student who moved from another state, which happens to rank in the bottom ten in education quality, two weeks ago (I know, that student doesn't "officially" count but still...). A student who came to school sick because there is no one at home to take care of them.
I'm not making excuses. I'm stating reality. Every teacher, in every classroom, in every district, in every state with high stakes testing will tell you the same story. So why do we do it? Why do we put up with sleepless nights, and the headaches and the diarrhea and the students? Because we are called to do it. Because we think, we hope, we pray, that we can make a difference in even one student's life. Because we had a teacher that made a difference in our lives. Because we love to see that aha moment in a kid's face. Because we like to push and pull and stretch that student to think more deeply and to understand why we solve that problem this way or that way. Because we want them to see that they have worth, not because they score well, or not well for that matter, but because their ideas and thoughts are valuable. Because school is the safest place for some of them to be. Because in your classroom, where they are held accountable for their actions and even when they really suck at something, they are loved. Unconditionally. That's why we do it.
